-After my flight landed the other day, the pilot went over the intercom to say “Happy birthday David!” It made my blood boil. Then you had other people wanting in. Some old bag yelled “How about George?!” Hey people, we’re on a plane, not at a fucking Benihana. Nobody cares that it’s your god damn birthday.
-One of my best qualities is being the appetizer guy for the table. I’ve said before that being the one to order the appetizers is a power move, but I’m also the one that says “okay so let’s figure out the appies” as soon as we sit down. Once that’s out of the way, people can focus on their main course. I can be a bit of a pest, but it’s a necessary evil.
-Every airport terminal should be required by law to have a McDonalds.
-When listening to music, I often wonder if I’m the only one to ever play certain consecutive songs. Like the other day, for example, I listened to “Work Hard, Play Hard” by Wiz Khalifa, “Scars to Your Beautiful” by Alessia Cara, and “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys back to back to back. I feel like I must’ve made history.
-People don’t talk about how I had an offer to play D3 lacrosse …. And that’s because it is simply not true.
-Daylight Savings Time is coming up on Saturday. It’s my favorite holiday of the year. When I was younger, I used to DM celebrities to remind them to set their clocks forward. It’s one of the weirdest things I’ve ever done, which is certainly saying something.
-I really do not want to get the Coronavirus.
-People are at their most attractive when looking in a hotel bathroom mirror. There’s some kind of black magic going on there.
-One of my biggest fears when flying is that when I’m walking back to my seat from the bathroom, I’ll get stuck behind the flight attendant pushing the drink cart. No way to squeeze through so it’s just a waiting game. I try to time my many bathroom trips to avoid this problem.
-I have decided that when I die at 93-years-old, my funeral song is going to be “My Way” by Frank Sinatra, but it will be my own version that I pre-record. And people will HAVE to pretend like it was an amazing rendition, because I’ll be like dead or whatever.
Audience Thought Of The Week
If you have a thought you want to be included in this blog, hit me up on Twitter/Instagram @tomscibelli and I’ll include the best one of the week.
-The term "slept like a baby" doesn't make sense. Babies wake up and cry in the middle of the night all the time. "Slept like a log" makes more sense for me because I roll around in my sleep, just as a log might roll on the ground.
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