-If you told a girl at a bar that you’re a “biker” it would probably get a very different reaction than telling her that you’re a “cyclist.”
-For awhile I thought I wanted to be good at chess, but I think I really just want other people to think I’m good at chess. So instead of learning, I’ll just start telling everyone I’m really good and hope nobody ever calls me out on it.
-Underrated fact about me: I’m great at chess.
-On a scale of 1-10, an 8.2 rating is generally considered to be very good. But out of a 100, an 82 isn’t that good. An 82 on a test would be a B- and that’s pretty subpar unless you’re a total dunce. Interesting how that works.
-If a company on the S&P 500 made it’s symbol $HAHA, then you could call it a literal laughing stock.
-I hate that we always just assume aliens are way smarter than us. If they’re so smart, why haven’t they come to Earth and taken us over yet? Maybe they’re just a bunch of dumb blobs bumping into walls and shit. Aliens could just basically be an overhyped draft prospect.
-My least favorite type of people is those who don’t keep a pizza box closed. When you’re sharing a pie with people, it’s so important to close the box after you take your slice to trap that heat. People who take their slice and leave it wide open have zero pizza etiquette.
-I don’t understand people who put their apps in folders. If it’s an app you use a lot, that just means you now need an extra click to get to it. You also have to remember what folder it’s in and where that folder is. Makes things unnecessary complicated.
-In the unlikely scenario where I ever get cast on The Bachelorette, I really think I could win. Not because I’d make her fall in love, but because I’d implement Survivor style strategies the show has never seen before. I’d have alliances with everyone. She’d never get the numbers to vote me out. She doesn’t want to give me a rose? I pull out a hidden immunity idol. Now some would say, “That’s not how the show works” but has anyone ever tried it?
Thank you for your time.