Let's go ahead an take care of the elephant in the room and I'm not talkin about your mother in law, folks. I look fucking good in a cowboy hat. For years, I've wanted to become a cowboy hat guy. I've lived in Texas for 10 years now so I rate, regardless of whether I have cattle or not.
....Extremely Barack Obama Voice.....
If you say that I am all hat and no cattle, I will block you. Simple as that. The gaunlet has been thrown down. The rules are in place.
Brighter notes, it's so fucking hot, baby girls. This summer proves once and for all that summer is the worst season. The only thing that even comes close is a season of loneliness which you wont experience if you are doing DIY projects and talking to Dale in the Paint Section of your local home improvement store.
Follow the Longtime Stoolie Accounts, turds.
Longtime Toolies: How To Install A Simple Bidet For That Ass2
Longtime Toolies: Saturdays Are For Mowing The Mother F'n Grass3
Longtime Toolies: Carving Up Some Christmas Gifts4
Longtime Toolies: Making My Workshop Suck Less5
Longtime Toolies: Am I A Piece of “Moronic Shit“ For Having A 96 Inch Level?6
Longtime Toolies: What I’ve Learned Over The Last Six Months7
Longtime Toolies: I've Made A Huge Mistake8
Longtime Toolies: Nerf Targets And The Unveiling Of My New Miter Saw (It's Incredible)9
Longtime Toolies: From A 5-Dollar Garage Sale Bike To A Birthday-Surprise Fortnite Bike10
Longtime Toolies: Harbor Freight's Miter Saw Is Trash And We Will Treat It As Such11
Longtime Toolies: How To Build A Simple But Beautiful Bench While Watching My Cheap-Ass Mi...12
Staycation Toolin Around The House: I Completed Many Projects And Sweat My Dick Raw Like M...13
Jackhammers Are Dangerous and Not Very Fun14
I Made My Own Axe. No Big Deal15
Longtime Toolies: I Built A "Fuck My Neighbors" Privacy Wall And I Think I'm Gonna Make Hi...16
Longtime Toolies: Top Ten Tools PLUS My Biggest Waste of Money Yet17
Longtime Toolies: The Top 10 Tools Everyone Should Have18
Longtime Toolies: Building A Floating Desk Without Plans
Longtime Toolies: Moving A Pallet Of Cinder Blocks Made Me Wanna Die20
Longtime Toolies: Smokin Weeds In The Stock Tank Pool21
Longtime Toolies: Let's Build A BBQ Area