Welcome to Lowering The Bar, the show where the rules are made up and the points don't matter. That's right, the points are like blue check mark's opinions.
The points on LTB do not matter (Sorry, Tommy) but integrity does. The most recent episode of LTB was a timed drinking competition that came with controversy as competitors attempted to Belichick / Earnie Adams the system and find loop holes.
The rules were …
- You must put the straw through the hole. (No piercing through the bottom of the pouch)
- No weapons.
Large was DQ'ed for bringing a switch blade to the bar. Illegal move for the drinking competition, and I'm about 99% blades like that aren't even street legal.
The real controversy was for first place between KFC and Kenjac. Are teeth a weapon? No more than hands. The rules never said you needed to use the straw, you just could not pierce the pouch from the bottom. While chewing aluminum and opening stuff with your teeth is technically "kid who wore cookie monster pajama pants to school behavior" it is a winning move - technically.
I believe Kenjac created a new way of competing. Like the Fosbury guy in the high jump who decided to start risking a snapped spinal column by flopping backwards over the bar.
That being said, I did promise an asterisks next to Kenjac's name to at least differentiate technique. Maybe one day there will be separate leagues, or everyone will adapt?
Until the league adapts, this is what the results will look like … congrats to Kenjac, but really KFC?
Lowering The Bar
The Most Honest Review Of The Pardon My Cheesesteak You'll Find2
Beaver Anal Gland Whiskey For My Men, Beer For My Horses3
"I Swear We Aren't Eating Penis, It's Pacific Geoduck"4
Half Born Duck Eggs Were The Food To Finally Break Everyone's Brain5
FINALLY Trying Balut - A Hardboiled Egg With A Duck Inside6
The Barstool Idol Contestants Eat Balut AKA Half Born Duck Eggs7
Billy Football Vs. Tommy Smokes: Battle for the Championship (Spoilers)8
Lowering The Bar Tournament Championship: Billy Football vs. Tommy Smokes9
Battle For A Trip To The Finals: Tommy Smokes vs. Alex Bennett (Spoilers)10
Lowering The Bar Tournament Semi-Finals: Tommy Smokes vs. Alex Bennett11
Kelly Keegs vs Tommy Smokes: Episode 4 Tournament Recap12
Lowering The Bar Tournament: Kelly Keegs vs Tommy Smokes13
Alex Bennett vs Jordyn Woodruff: Episode 3 Tournament Recap14
Lowering The Bar Tournament: Alex vs Jordyn15
Smitty vs MRags: Episode 2 Tournament Recap16
PFT vs Billy Football: Episode 1 Tournament Recap17
Lowering The Bar Tournament: MRags vs. Smitty18
Barstool HQ Tastes The Beanut Butter Cup19
Lowering The Bar Tournament: Billy Football vs. PFT Commenter20
The Most Dangerous Spectacle In Racing: The Barstool 50021
Barstool Blows Bubbles With Melted Jolly Ranchers22
Lowering The Bar: Chomping Down On Pig Penis23
A Mother's Day Tradition: Guess That Barstool Mom24
NO BURPING Is The Only Rule For The Viral Soda Chug Challenge25
UFC Champ Alex Volkanovski Attempts To Knock Out The Century Egg