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The Cleveland Browns Have Hired An Abercrombie & Fitch Employee To Help Right Their Sinking Ship

Ladies and Gentlemen: your Cleveland Browns.

Here's how I imagine the front office meeting went this morning after falling to 2-4 in perhaps the most embarrassing loss by any team all season:

Andrew Berry (GM) - "Well guys, we have the 31st ranked defense in a league of 32 teams. We gave up 38 points and 300 passing yards yesterday to the Patriots third string quarterback. We've blown three 4th quarter leads by blowing coverages in the secondary. And we gave up 238 rushing yards to the last ranked rushing offense in the NFL."

Kevin Stefanski (Head Coach) - "Should we fire the Defensive Coordinator, who admitted himself that we have a Top 5 talent of a defense even though we're ranked 31st?"

Jimmy Haslam (Owner) - "I'm not sure I completely understand those numbers. Let's hire an analyst to decipher them for us. Anyone go the phone number for Abercrombie & Fitch?"

I'm not saying this is a bad move and I'm not saying this is a good move. I'm sure moves like this happen all the time, but the idea that the Cleveland Browns season is crumbling before our very eyes and we went out and stole the Lead Data Scientist from a teenage girls clothing company is laugh out loud funny and a terrible optic. Me personally, I would start by getting rid of Joe Woods. But then again, maybe Joe Woods is a really good coach that is just lacking the data needed to right this ship. 

**It must be noted that I had to double check on this hire's validity because remember the time Schefter reported that the Browns wanted to interview Condoleezza Rice for their HEAD COACHING JOB?

Only the Browns.