-I feel like there’s an inverse relationship between how often your mom calls you handsome and how handsome you actually are. Average guys get it a lot. But like Leonardo DiCaprio? I think it’d be weird if his mom was always saying “Oh my boy is so handsome.” Like no shit, mom, I’m fucking Leonardo DiCaprio.
-I bet that, statistical speaking, more group text messages get ignored than personal text messages. You’d think your odds are increased since there’s more people to respond to it, but the pressure of responding is way less because you assume someone else can answer it. Just an observation.
-I think the third “ha” is becoming the new standard in text messages. It used to be that “haha” was the standard, but now it’s almost insulting to get just two “ha”s. “Hahaha” might be the new standard with that fourth “ha” now being what you strive for. Something to keep your eye on.
-If someone put a gun to my head and asked me to correctly identify the differences between a trumpet, a trombone, and a tuba, I would get shot and die.
-I wonder if it’s awkward in movies or shows when they have to cast a character that’s very clearly supposed to be the fat or ugly character. Does an actor or actress feel insulted when they’re cast for that role or do they just think “I get it.”
-I’ve always found it weird that some people start to call their spouses parents “mom and dad” once they’re married. It almost makes it seem weird and incestuous, and I just don’t care for it.
-Door open buttons on elevators are drastically underused. Every time it’s closing, the person’s instinct is to just put their hand there to stop the door, but there is a button there for that very thing. It’s something I am personally trying to be better at.
-I’ve been trying to work on a joke that goes something like “What do you call Whoopi Goldberg’s pillows?” and then working in “whoopee cushions” but I can’t figure out the exact phrasing. Gonna be absolutely hilarious whenever I nail it down. I will keep you guys updated.
Thank you for your time.