I Just Moved Jairus Lyles To The Top Of My Draft Board

No joke Jairus Lyles is the best basketball player in the history of hardwood and orange rims. I don’t know what size that bucket was that my beloved Retrievers were shooting on in the second half but it looked no smaller than the Pacific Ocean. It was 21-21 at halftime and then Jairus scored roughly 200 consecutive points while Kyle Guy and the boys were drowning. We were licking crackers out there to stop cramps while Tony Bennett was sitting on his thumb trying to figure out how to draw a simple flex play for an easy bucket. But the one thing Tony Bennett didn’t take into account is that THERE ARE NO EASY BUCKETS ON THE RETRIEVERS, TONY, YOU BUFFOON.

I’ll see everyone in San Antonio. No need to pussyfoot around the inevitable here and make an unnecessary pit stop in Vegas. I mean us Retrievers just 20-pieced the #1 seed in the Tournament like it was nothing. This is a team of destiny and everyone with a brain can sense that. Hope Chaps has some room on his couch.