CRAZY Dude Riding On The Outside Of The Subway

There is absolutely no worse feeling in this world than running down the steps of the subway, dodging people like you’re Barry Sanders, hitting the turnstile and getting through with one seamless Metro Card swipe, only to hear the “BONG BONG” sound and watch the subway doors close right in your face. The person who was just 1 foot away from you who slipped through the closing doors look back at you and its almost like he won and you lost. Smug fucking look on his mug as he starts his journey and you gotta wait on the sweat, asbestosis platform for, at minimum, another 3 minutes for the train to come. You’re a little out of breath because thats technically the most exercise you’ve done in weeks. Maybe even a little sweaty now. It sucks. Its one of the biggest Ls you can take on a daily basis in New York City.

Well this guy right here? He does not take that same L. He refuses to hold it. This guy doesnt let the subway doors decide what train he does and does not get on. This dude does not stand clear of the closing doors. He hops aboard the 6 train like he’s one of those Indian people dangling from their commuter trains on the Punjabi countryside. Only difference is the subway is going 60 zillion miles an hour and your back is probably about 6 inches from a brick wall. Even if you are Spider Man like this motherfucker and you can hold on to the outside of a speeding train, who’s to say there isnt gonna be a brick wall or metal pipe or a switch sign or something else thats gonna pop out down the tracks and fucking CREAM you? If you do fall off before getting splattered against the wall, there’s always the third rail to absolutely electrocute you to death. But does this look like the face of a man worried about those things?

 Nope. Thats the look of a crazy person who just refused to wait a few more minutes for a train that he could be inside of.

PS – Hey dude trying to dap it up with him through the glass – guy is busy. Doesnt have a free hand at the moment.