Live Event2024 En Eff El Draft Presented by DraftKingsWatch Now
The En Eff El Draft Show | Tonight 8PM ETTUNE IN

Swinging From Your Pal's Penis During Martial Arts Training Is Very Unsafe

Screen Shot 2017-05-08 at 1.27.31 PM

Not sure if my headline is accurate because clearly, this gentleman is holding his friend in the air with his penis AND testicles. Sorry for the click bait.

I don’t want you to think that I’m not impressed by this feat because I am. That’s the reason I’m writing this blog. If you let some fella dangle from your privates, I’ll write a blog about it. That’s my promise to you. But I’m tired of everybody acting like this dude’s dick is king dingaling. Sure, it can hold you above a yoga mat. But can it defeat you? Seems like his dick is all defense and no offense. His dick is basically the Houston Texans.

This guy’s penis is basically just monkey bars. Is it fun? Yes. Entertaining? You clicked; didn’t you? But, it’s all show. It’s not like this dick that will make you submit in the squared-circle.

Also, I didn’t blur the penis out on this blog because if you really wanted to see it, you gotta stare hard and that’s on you if you do. I wont ever post a large dick on the screen but we can play where’s waldo with a smaller cock and I think that’s fine and suitable for work. If your boss disagrees, have them email me at chaps@barstoolsports.com and we can work it out with a little trip to the Octagon with my friend Robbie Fox.