The Needed Americanization Of Soccer Part Two: Away Goals Need To GTFO





Away goals are even dumber than the EPL not having a postseason and they need to go the way of the Dodo bird, immediately.


How preposterous is it that if Man City had scored a goal during the Champions League semis today then they’d be the ones advancing to the final? The game would’ve been a tie 1-1, the aggregate would have been tied 1-1, but Man City would be advancing because away goals count as two. That. Is. INSANE.


I tried to explain it to Hank while the match was going on and I think he went into a coma, he couldn’t handle it. He just kept telling me that I was lying. No, Hank, this is the way they do it overseas and its why our forefathers finally broke ties with England: taxation without representation and stupid fucking rules for advancement.


I know the Brits love their gambling but teams essentially playing with a spread is a little heavy handed, if you ask me. Imagine NFL games were played with that “3 points for the home team” spread? That would be madness and that’s essentially what these away goals are. Your job is harder on the road and in front of a hostile crowd so here are free points. RIDICULOUS. The world would make no sense if home runs at away ballparks counted as double so why should away goals in soccer?


Stop with the stupid rules to just confuse everyone and play a three game series like adults. Or play with overtime. Or play one game. I don’t fucking know, but do something. Away goals are an insult to sports fans.