"Highlights" From Doug Pederson's And Howie Roseman's 30 Minutes Of Pure Drivel At The NFL Combine
Well that was boring as whaleshit. Here’s what we got from that 30 minutes of the stale crouton with a haircut and NFL head coaching job and his dirty shrew of a GM:
– Coach Reid, Chase Daniel, and Mike Holmgrem – OH MY! How many times can we mention people that currently have absolutely no affiliation with this team? The number of verbal blowjobs to Chase Daniel alone was particulary disturbing. “He’s proven himself with that ‘Starter’s Mentality’ backing up Alex, and with the number of times he’s actually started games.” Oh, yeah, those whole 2 starts. That 30-year-old really has established himself as a franchise QB.
– I guess talks are currently ongoing with Sam Bradford and his people. A nice smokescreen for when The Savior Chase Daniel levitates down from the sky and saves this franchise.
– Doug Pederson said Chase Daniel reminds him of himself when he was a backup QB. Doug Pederson also called himself a great backup QB. FYI, Doug Pederson sucked hot gorilla grundle at backup QB.
– “The biggest challenge will be to sell your message and to them to buy in…the message is we are committed to the players on the roster.” Let’s make sure we shit on and distance ourselves from Chip Kelly as much as possible.
– Howie has 3000 scouting reports and 4 per player for the NFL combine. Damn shame those might as well be written in Ancient Arabic. Nobody on staff is going to do dick with that information.
– Roseman on the hiring of Doug E. Fresh – “It was a very easy marriage for us. His vision for team was right in line with ours.” Oh, so you basically confirmed he’s a puppet yes man who was solely hired because he can play nice with the front office. Thanks.
– There’s way too much public confidence from Howie in Doug Pederson and Frank Reich as coaches because they “Played QB in the NFL”. So did Steve Spurrier. Just because you’ve never played a down in your life doesn’t make people who did at the highest level brilliant football minds. Fuck I hate this guy.
– “The point of the front office is to find players that fit (Doug Pederson’s) vision.” WHY THE FUCK DIDN’T YOU ACCEPT THAT 2 YEARS AGO INSTEAD OF FIRING TOM GAMBLE AND SNAKING YOUR WAY THROUGH THE FRANCHISE BECAUSE OF YOUR GODDAMN EGO?!?!
THIS:
– Did Howie Roseman just try and jokingly say a reporter is feeling sexy at 25:00 but came off sounding like an animal rapist? Yes. Yes he did.
Bottom line – This really did nothing except boil my blood. Can’t wait for the draft. Thanks. Here’s to a great 2016 and beyond, boys!
