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This Visit Philly Ad Featuring A Giant Ben Franklin Making A Bigger Cheesesteak Ejaculate Whiz Is...Something

All righty then. Not too sure what we’re trying to do here, Visit Philly. Not too sure Ben Franklin shooting laser beams from his eyes at a giant cheesesteak is gonna bring in those tourism dollars, but to each their own. At least have them fight somewhere outside of Center City. Hell, take the battle out to Upper Darby and it still wouldn’t be the biggest brawl on any given day.

Sidenote: If you bump into Big Bad Franklin at Misconduct (where he is at 99% of his life), you bet your sweet nuts he’d appreciate a beer. And no, I do not know the context of this photo or why Ben’s syphilitic hands are around my throat, and quite frankly, I don’t want to know. Maybe it’s time to cut back on the booze.