These Belichick Stories Will Make You Wet

That’s my face reading this article. I highly, highly suggest reading the entire thing because it’s the purest form of Patriots Porn. Just paragraph after paragraph of “Our leader is better than yours in every single facet of life, and it’s not even close.” I read the entire thing with an ear to ear smile and a chub in my pants, it’s really that good.

A few highlights:

1. Belichick literally practices for headset malfunctions. Funny how we didn’t hear anything about this Super Bowl XLVI headset malfunctioning? Guess losers complain and winners get better.

2. Belichick gave his hotel room to Lawyer Milloy at Super Bowl XXXVI. I assume Bill actually tricked Milloy into taking this room. He found the Bourbon view a little too flashy then went to the basement of the hotel and gameplanned on a cot for the rest of the week.

3. Milloy still cries when he thinks about how it all ended. Everyone looks at Bill like a tough dad. You fight, you get mad, he’s smarter, stronger and has a bigger dick than you. But when he finally reaches out? Man, it’s just the best.