So we are back to this shit again, huh? It feels like we had weekly if not daily blogs over the summer here at Barstool of a different singer or celebrity under attack from randos in the audience over the summer. Things seemed to settle down once 50 Cent decided to fight back with such precision that I wonder if his awful first pitch before the Mets game was all to go viral.
I could go into a long diatribe about how fucked up throwing objects at a random person is while blaming whatever generation is the current scapegoat for all the wrong we see on the internet (I think Gen Z is still the flavor of the month). But enough digital ink has rightly been spilled about that on this and every other site.
Instead I will marvel that someone at Comic Con actually had the accuracy to hit someone in the face. I know that Comic Cons have evolved from a place where only unathletic nerds go to a place where some athletic nerds go as well. But after watching the awful quarterback play in the NFL this year, I also know how hard it is to find someone that can hit a target of any size from any distance, whether they are moving or not. If the guys getting paid the big or at least medium bucks have trouble hitting their mark, you have to hypothetically tip your cap to someone that did. Not that I would tip my cap to this random person because Florence Pugh scares the shit out of me for reasons I don't fully understand. It's not even because she's Black Widow's sister or anything either. I was more scared of her character in Oppenheimer than anybody else on the screen, including every atomic bomb that was dropped, and she was as vulnerable as can be considering she was naked and/or fucking most of the time.
As for the punishment, I think anybody who gets caught throwing something at a celebrity should be subject to the punishment of a Slap Bet administered by a security guard that works at the place where it happens.
As is the case with all Slap Bets, the slaps can be laid down whenever the slapper wants. Celebrities have enough money to put together a pretty decent slush fund that would allow the security guards to take some time away from their gigs, which would really fuck with the heads of the assholes that love sniping celebs with random objects and probably put an end to all this nonsense. Oh yeah and all the slaps will be filmed then posted to the internet, to stop people from throwing shit and to backfill all the content smut sites like this one will miss out on once these degenerates stop throwing shit at celebrities.
P.S. Here are Florence Pugh's actual scenes from Oppenheimer for the people that clicked on that link but were instead greeted with the kind of nerdy faces you would expect to see at a Comic Con. May you all have a blessed day.