Mario Scalise got so tired of watching the White Sox, he started making pizzas instead.
Never have things felt as miserable as this season.
So Scalise is inviting Sox fans to drown their sorrows in cheese and beer dough. On Thursday, Stix n Brix, 218 W. 33rd St., will give away 100 pizzas to mark the team’s 100 losses this year.
“Maybe I’ll make an extra and I’ll see how the day does and bump it up more and keep giving them away, within reason,” Scalise said. “It’s like a condolence gift. If you go to a funeral and give someone a hug, we’re offering a pizza for that.”
I had this conversation with a friend last week: the worst thing about the White Sox being bad year over year is the effect it has on the local economy. Obviously Bridgeport and Armour Square are not Wrigleyville, but there are a handful of fantastic bars in the neighborhood you just know took a beating: Turtles, Cork and Kerry, Shinnick's, Wings and Rings, Ballpark Pub…doesn't matter. Those places probably all got pretty gutted by the White Sox hoodwinking us this year and last.
And I haven't even started talking about stadium staff, Uber drivers to/from park, etc. The White Sox (and other teams) pissing off their fanbase so much that fans stop showing up has a snowball effect on how much money people and businesses in the area make….and now we got Pizza Places dishing out free food because the team was historically bad.
And mind you - this is a team that was historically bad in the MIDST OF WHAT THEY SAID WOULD BE THEIR CONTENTION WINDOW!!!!
It's astonishing, embarrassing, nauseating, infuriating. The White Sox illicit every single bad emotion out of their fanbase, especially and specifically apathy.
Anyways, here's the pizza place's aggregate score on 10 total reviews who's dishing out the free pizza:
Looks like it's thought of as pretty average. Doesn't matter for this topic though. What matters is the White Sox were and are so bad that even local pizza joints are trying to capitalize on the organization being a dumpster fire instead of drawing in people who are in the area to attend a game.
TL/DR - fuck the White Sox and everything they're doing right now