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Veronika Rajek and Gisele Offer Very Different Retirement Wishes for Tom Brady

Retirement is not for everybody. If you've ever seen someone who doesn't need the money but nevertheless keeps working way beyond the age they should be relaxing and enjoying their golden years, there's usually a reason for that. More times than I care to count I've had older guys who still have jobs tell me, "When you retire, they throw you a party. And you only get one party after that." Referring, of course, to your funeral. 

But that time has come for Tom Brady. Reluctantly, perhaps. Somewhat surprisingly. Unceremoniously, to be sure. Like I said earlier, a bit late in my humble opinion. But in his own words, "for good" this time. 

And as such, he deserves that second-to-last party the old bucks are always referring to. Not just a gathering in the break room, with  "BEST OF LUCK" on a sheet cake, a card everyone signed and the gag gift of a rocking chair. After which, everyone starts the Game of Thrones-style battles for his corner office and forgetting he ever existed. Brady deserves a regal farewell. A celebration worthy of his kingly status. And that can best be achieved only through the women in his life. 

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The first being his wife of 13 years and the mother of his two youngest children. Gisele chose to honor her ex-husband with a comment under his retirement post. And I'm struggling to find the right adjective to describe it:

Formal? Muted? Tepid? Generic? Lukewarm, maybe? I mean, you know those greeting cards I mentioned a minute ago? I bet everyone of us has written almost these on some fellow employee's card dozens of times. Just never when it was someone you considered a friend, in or out of work. And it's hard not to read that and conclude anything other than whatever caused their breakup is still lingering. 

Now, it would be fair for you to come at me with, "You're a beautiful intellectual, Old Balls. But you're wrong on this. Gisele is probably just keeping her private thoughts between just the two of them. Maybe she called or texted him personally. What do you expect her to say on his Instagram for the whole world to read?" And to that I say, "Thank you." And, "I expect the same reaction he's getting from Veronika Rajek." 

You should know this by now, but Rajek is the model who was internet famous before she started making a huge display of expressing her GOAT Love:

And who is sometimes referred to as Brady's "new girlfriend," even though we have no confirmation the two have ever met or been together in a setting smaller than a capacity crowd at Raymond James Stadium. 

But what we do know, is that no sooner did he announce he's retiring really for reals this time, that she leapt to the 'Gram to do the three things she does best. Put on a swimsuit. Pose for photos in her swimsuit. Dispense the sort of wisdom that really puts your major life decisions in perspective:

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Advantage: Veronika.

It's one thing to throw some lazy, perfunctory platitudes in your ex's comments. It's another thing entirely to be at a beach resort in Tulum, Mexico, just south of Cancun, grinding away in the workaday world of Instagram modeling, and drop everything to talk about retirement just as the man you're crushing on announces his. It's a lovely way to let him know he's in your thoughts. He's in your heart. And no distance or his sudden absence from any NFL roster can take that away from these two crazy kids. It's beautiful. 

So let this be a lesson, not just to Gisele, but to any prospective Brady suitors out there. Veronika Rajek is prepared to outwork all of you when it comes to getting his attention. And winning his affections. His retirement years will only give her more opportunities. And this is only Day One.