Kanye Kidnapped And Decapitated Pete Davidson In A New Music Video For His Latest Act Of Extremely Rational, Not At All Unhinged Behavior

I think I'm out on decapitations. Before you laud me with applause and adulation for such a brave stance, it's not for the reasons you may think. 

You see, when my generation was growing up we had this little program called "Celebrity Deathmatch" on MTV. It was claymation, much like this music video, and it was the goriest, bloodiest show of all time. 

A decapitation in "Celebrity Death Match" would barely get ref Mills Lane involved, let alone be the end of the brawl. That was like touching gloves in real world boxing. If you're going to go full claymation for a music video, why stop at a simple kidnap + decap combo? That's so goddamn weak. I don't even think Kanye hates this guy one iota if all he can muster for anger is a decapitation. Rip out his end trails, wrap them around his throat, tie him to the back of that ATV, and drag that ass around town for the duration of the verse. This was a sign of affection far as I'm concerned and until I see more carnage I'm forced to believe this is all a work.