During a good manners and etiquette class being taught at the local high school for senior boys, the young, attractive, first-year teacher asked, "If you were courting a well-educated girl from a prominent family and during dinner, you needed to use the bathroom, how would you properly excuse yourself from the table?"
Charlie was first to raise his hand and being the smart-alec that he is, he offered his short declaration, "Back in a minute, I need to take a piss!"
The class laughed but the teacher shook her head side to side in disapproval and then in a stern tone she set him straight, "That would be very rude and improper on your part."
Mike raised his hand next and thinking he knew exactly how to articulate his departure from the dinner table he said proudly, "I'm sorry, I need to use the toilet. Please excuse me, I'll be back in a minute."
The teacher was much happier with Mike's polite approach but made one suggestion, "Mentioning the word "toilet" during a meal, is unpleasant. It's best to refrain from using it while dining."
Then, without raising his hand, Nick stood up and in a very dignified and exaggerated tone he announced, "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend, one whom I hope to be able to introduce to you shortly after dinner…"
* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968
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