There Is Simply No Way Saquon Barkley Can Find A Pair Of Pants To Fit Over These Meaty, Meaty Thighs

Okay so first and foremost...Von Dutch trucker hats are officially back, baby! Been waiting on this moment for like 17 years. Von Dutch hats, Motorola Razr phone, some baggy jeans, let's run that shit back. 

But for Saquon Barkley, well I don't suppose there is a pair of jeans on the planet that are baggy enough to fit those yams in them. I mean goodness mother hecking gracious. That man's thighs are the size of most fully grown adult's torsos. I'd try to count the amount of muscles that are visible in this photo but I don't have a calculator on me and I'm not great at doing multiplication in my head. 

There are 2 jobs which might be the most difficult in the world at this point. The first is being an NFL defensive player who is tasked with trying to bring down Saquon Barkley. The second would be a tailor trying to figure out a way to get a pair of pants to fit around those tree trunks. I'd rather be the linebacker, if we're being honest. 

P.S. - Can't spell "Elite At Twitter" without Eli.