Lighten the Fuck Up! She Was Newly Divorced & Willing to Flirt for Free Drinks...

Image Source. Getty Images.

A newly divorced woman decided to go to a popular bar located on the top floor of a posh ten-story building to see if she still had what it takes to flirt and get her drinks for free… She saw a handsome, well-dressed guy who appeared mild-mannered, quietly sitting at the bar alone and patiently sipping his drink. She sauntered over and in an attempt to start a conversation, she asked him what he was drinking. "Magic Beer", the guy boldly replied. Her divorce had just become final and she hadn't been single for very long and never heard of "Magic Beer"… 

Before starting to flirt, she began having second thoughts and decided that the guy was acting a little unpredictable, so she smiled, batted her eyes, and began making her way around the bar hoping to find another good-looking guy to flirt with… After she didn't find anyone else worth talking to, she went back to the guy and playfully asked, "That isn't really "Magic Beer", is it?" The guy adjusted his thick black eyeglasses, laughed out loud, and responded, "Yeah, and I'll show you just how "magic" it is…" 

He took a sip of the beer, got up off his barstool, opened a window, then jumped out and flew around the building three times before returning through the open window. The woman couldn't believe her eyes and challenged him with, "I bet you can't do that again!" "Oh yea", he said in a confident tone. He took another sip of beer, jumped out the window, flew around the building three more times, and returned through the open window just as he had done the first time… 

The woman was amazed and immediately asked for a "Magic Beer" of her own. The guy motioned to the bartender and said, "I got this" and then turned to the woman and said, "The first one's on me". The bartender poured the beer into a pint glass and placed it on a coaster in front of her. She smiled and thanked both the guy and the bartender, happy that she still had the ability to flirt and get a free drink, especially after being married for all those years… 

After taking just one sip of the "Magic Beer", she unexpectedly got up off her barstool and proceeded to jump out of the open window just as the guy had done… and immediately plummeted 10 stories to her tragic demise… 

The bartender poured another beer for the guy and began shaking his head in disbelief, "You know something Superman, you're a real a-hole after you've had a few…"
 

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968