Steven Seagal Is Now Apparently A Real Life Double Agent That Gifts Samurai Swords To World Leaders

Ok(Reuters) - Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro received a samurai sword as a gift from actor Steven Seagal, who was visiting the South American country as a representative of Russia, state television images showed on Tuesday evening.

Maduro, wearing a white facemask and a traditional Venezuelan black long sleeve shirt known as a liqui liqui, positioned the sword over his shoulder as Seagal nodded and pointed in affirmation, the images broadcast from the Miraflores presidential palace in Caracas showed.

"The Venezuelan head of state maneuvers after drawing the sword," a state television narrator said, calling the weapon a "symbol of leadership."

"I had a very friendly, affectionate encounter with Steven Seagal," Maduro said on Wednesday in a broadcast on television in which he referred to the U.S. actor as "my brother."

"We are going to shoot a movie together that will be called 'Nico Ma Duro de tumbar,' a wordplay on his name meaning 'Nico Ma is hard to knock down,'" Maduro continued.

"It is the new Steven Seagal film. We are going to fight the demons, the bad guys. I am 'Nico.'"

 

Does this mean that Steven Seagal and Eddie are boys now through the transitive property? 

I think it does right?

Does anybody have a connect so we can get him on The Dogwalk? That would be an electric interview. 

What a wild ride it's been for Seagal. He's arguably lived one of the best lives of anybody born in the last half-century. 

He went from hanging out on the movie set of Under Siege with a topless Erika Eleniak

(fun fact- we were supposed to get a topless Pamela Anderson playing this role but she turned down Big Steve for a date so he demanded Eleniak get the role instead)

Now, he's hanging out in the jungle of Venezuela with topless shamen.

Seagal is not just an international peace broker/friend of evil axis dictators, he's a modern-day renaissance man. 

Look how tight he is with Vlad. 

What a dap.

If he hasn’t been contracted as a double agent at this point then I’m embarrassed for our government and Russia’s both. Big no brainer.

Guy has access to anybody anywhere. And he’s a natural. How pumped do you think Maduro was to receive this sword? 

Talk about an unreal housewarming gift. 

Also love his soundbyte about doing a movie together. You just know they were getting fucked up together and telling pussy jokes like two dudes when Maduro said "you know what would be awesome? If we did a movie together…" Drunk Seagal did what anybody who was hammered having a good time with somebody would do and said "yah bro, totally." Next thing you know he's waking up in the morning with a script for 'Nico Ma Duro de tumbar' on the foot of his bed. Those are the best nights and worst mornings.

p.s. - you think Seagal has ever worn a mask? clown question bro.

p.p.s.- I never saw this video until now and I want to thank Charlize Theron for bringing it to my attention.

In an appearance on Howard Stern's radio show in 2020, Charlize Theron questioned whether Seagal truly had the prowess to earn his purported black belt in martial arts.

"At night I'll go online to watch fighters or watch people fight and you always come across that odd Seagal video of him 'fighting' in Japan, but he really isn't," Theron, 45, said.

She continued: "He's just incredibly overweight and pushing people. He's overweight and can barely fight … look it up, it's ridiculous. He's shoving people by the face. It's a whole setup."

Incredible. 

Listen to Eddie on the Dogwalk