Scumbag Smitty Goes Down Once Again

I went into Stool Streams Stadium today and did what I said I was going to do. I knew I was going to have to put up with distractions I couldn't have foreseen — today, it was having two bobbleheads and a baseball taken off my desk and subsequently pulled out by Scumbag Smitty during our match — but I prepared myself for the unexpected and did not allow myself to be fazed by this nonsense.

You just have to know what you're dealing with going in and adjust. And that's exactly what I did when I stood firm in the SSS and completed the sweep.

I wish the victory felt a little sweeter, to be honest, but that's what I expected to do. Even letting him get a game would have been a loss. I think I backed up what I said yesterday:

I really haven't been this amped up for anything in a long time. I don't just want to win; I want to make abundantly clear who has the upper hand in any real-life competition in this eternal struggle. I remember everything this man has ever said about me and I plan to harness the energy it fills me with and unleash it on the cornhole board tomorrow.

It's always good to come away with a win during Rivalry Week. I look forward to defending my perfect Stool Streams record next time.