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Did You Know There's A Guy On The Marlins Who Is Also An Olympic Speed Skater?

I saw this tweet last night and my mind was blown. Is this the most outrageous two-sport combo in history? Jeremy Bloom being a skier and football player was pretty unique but at least he's from Colorado so it actually isn't that weird at all. Eddy Alvarez is from fuckin' Miami. He's an Olympic speed skater from Miami. Is that a thing down there or something? Because I spent a lot of time in hockey rinks in the northeast most of my life and I never even met a speed skater. I met a few male figure skaters who would do twirls right in my face and make me look like an asshole while I was trying to show off my power turns at public skating, but I never crossed paths with a single speed skater. This list of people who speed skate and play baseball, not even at the highest levels I mean even just recreationally, has to start and end with Eddy Alvarez.

Obviously, this got me thinking about what two things I excel at. What would be two things I perform exceptionally? Do they even exist? I honestly don't think so. Like I started thinking at just a base level, what do I do daily? I type a lot, and I've taken a test but can only do that at a slightly above average level. Can't even type and listen to music at the same time because I just start typing the lyrics. In fact, I can't really do anything and listen to music. I just get distracted and forget what I'm supposed to be doing. I drive in silence most of the time, hell I don't put music on in the shower because I'll zone out for 20 minutes then wonder why I'm standing in a room where it's raining. There's the "walk and chew gum joke" but to be honest, I can't really do those two things that well either. I'm a fine walker but I don't really chew gum I just eat it. Doesn't matter what kind, I get about three bites in and swallow it. I currently have multiple families of spiders living inside me.

So I don't know what I have that's remotely comparable to this, I strongly suspect it's nothing, I just know it's incredibly impressive despite how peculiar a duo it is.