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Whatever Happened To S.O.T.’ing Babes?

Maybe it makes me a huge Prude but I honestly haven't seen some sweet SOT action in God knows how long. Even if the guy filming served as Tom Hanks stunt double in Saving Private Ryan. Even if the zoom function on the camera is coming in and out like a poorly edited scene of Succession that nobody ever complains about. Even if those titties are as sweet as I imagine from my vantage point, it's been so goddamn long I don't even know if I still identify with SOT. Which is a shame to even admit because there was a time SOT was in your verbage. 

And to think just last week we got super deep talking about the motorboat in Wedding Crashers. I didn't realize it at the time but now I'm thinking the motorboat basically replaced the way men talk about playing with a pair of hooters. And with it went the sensuality of Suck.On.Tits in exchange for the speed-based motorboat. I completely understand how we get here, I just didn't realize it in the process, which brings me back to the above video. 

Call me crazy but to me this is more diabolical than the Bills fans that finger each other's asses. 

Definitely not as gross per se but at least the Bills fans are trying to be discrete. Like at least give them some credit for leaving the bag of dildos and rubber fist in the parking lot. That's why I'm giving the nod to sucking tits on Lake Michigan because it's just so blatantly in your face that those titties are getting sucked. Maybe it doesn't go past the softcore Cinemax guidelines but on daytime programming alone this one's over the line.