On today's Mickstape, we argued for close to 45 minutes over bread. It may have been even longer, as time is a social construct only used to perpetu......nevermind, I'm off base already.
I'm a croissant man. I've got no gripe with bagels but if they're both available, I'll go croissant every time. Whether it's at the finest bakery in the city, the airport shop, buying out of the coat of homeless man, etc. I can see how people would prefer bagels but suffice it to say, I was floored when the Mick Man revealed that he prefers a plain bagel. Like he'll just pick the shit up and eat it with nothing on it. A plain ass bagel with no spread on it feels tougher to eat and digest than a tennis ball. After I called the authorities, we finished our debate.
Most of the points I've heard against croissants is that they leave a mess when you eat them. Yes, the flaky pastry bread leaves flakes when you eat them. It'd be a bad sign if it didn't. But barbecue leaves a mess too, do we hate that as well? Cheetos? Wings? C'mon now, let's be adults here. I'd love to be sat in a high chair with a bib on my chest and fed a croissant piece by piece so I don't get messy but this is the real world. I'll wear a couple of flakes on my chest like a badge of honor.
Another gripe I've heard against croissants is that you can't dress them up the way you can with a bagel. You've got me there. If you put much better food on a bagel, it makes it better to eat. You'll get no argument from me there. If you put blueberries and cinnamon raisins in the bagel and then a variety of different spreads on the bagel, it punches it up quite a bit. "You guys are really sleeping on rice cakes. Once you slather it with Chicken Florentine, you can't beat it". Croissants don't need as many alterations.
My favorite is the "you have to get them from this particular place in this city or on this block for them to be good".
Multiple people replied with questions about is pizza even good because it's regional. Pizza styles are regional (NY, Chicago, Detroit, etc) but you can get good pizza anywhere. It's better in some places or at some establishments than others, but you can find good pizza anywhere you look. If the only good bagels are in NY, then forgive me as I pass them over for the croissant that I know will be good anywhere. Is the world's best bagel better than the world's best croissant? Perhaps and this is the research I would love to conduct one day but that's betting on a streaky player. But I can't say I've ever had a bad croissant and the consistency has to play a factor here.
The one thing that I think we can all agree on, is that both of these breads are playing for second place. Biscuits reign supreme for now and forevermore.
We get into the debate more on today's Tape but let's embrace debate!!!!!
Croissants or bagels?