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The Remote Controlled Face Mask Has Arrived And It Is Glorious

Well there you have it- the mask of the future. Completely reasonable and a definite game changer when it comes to safety in the COVID-19 era. Will people use it? It's tough to say. Part of me feels like kermit the frog surgical masks may be a turn off to some people. Then again, who knows?

The mask has two settings- manual and automatic. Manual will use a lever and atomic will sense a fork approaching your fat disgusting mouth and open the mask for you. Which I can 100% see the crowd at Cheesecake Factory using. 


Imagine walking into an establishment and seeing a bunch of people wearing automatic masks? That's a level of laziness I didn't even know existed. I have it faith won't happen and that corona will eventually disappear, but if it doesn't I may back stroke myself into the ocean like Lieutenant Dan.