Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher

Weymouth, MA - A 36-year-old food service worker at a Weymouth middle school has been charged with raping a teenager. Janelle Foley was arraigned Thursday in Quincy District Court on four counts of statutory rape following her arrest at her home Wednesday night. According to prosecutors, Foley had sexual relations with a 15-year-old boy around the holidays. An investigation is ongoing concerning a second victim, believed to be a juvenile relative of Foley… Foley’s attorney William Sullivan, told the court Foley is a life-long resident of Weymouth, has no criminal record, is married with four children between 7 and 15 years old… He claimed Foley has substance and depression issues that may have resulted in a “lapse in judgement” and asked the judge to impose a $1,000 cash bail with GPS monitoring.

And this is how we kick off a great New Year of Teacher Sex Scandals in style. With a blonde smokeshow MILF from my own hometown. In the 380+ years of the great town of Weymouth’s history, it has produced a few distinguished citizens. Abigail Adams. Hal Holbrook. NHL journeyman Bobby Sheehan. The drug kingpin Johnny Depp played in “Blow.” Jerry Thornton. And now, Janelle Foley. I couldn’t be more proud if she was slinging American Chop Suey with a side of Sex Scandal to me back at Weymouth South Junior. So congratulations my fellow Wildcat for making the big time. We’re only 9 days into 2014 and it’s already shaping up to be a banner year.

The Grades:

Looks: Not one of the all time greats, but she’s a Weymouth 9. The kind you’d see packing the dance floor at Hajjar’s or doing Stevie Nicks Karaoke in a jean jacket at the Cathay Center on a Saturday night. Grade: A very prejudiced A

Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: Not a ton of details. But we’ve got the all important “lapse in judgment” talk from her attorney, which is legalese for “Yeah, she boned a 15 year old kid she met in the lunch line and probably her nephew too.” Grade: A

Intangibles: Unbelievably, I managed to get through 12 years of Weymouth Public Schools without any teachers taking a run at my hotness. But I’m proud to say we’re finally on the SST map. Grade: A

Overall: A very preferential A.

[Thanks to my buddy Duke] Have information about a hot female teacher having sex with her students? Preferably with pictures? Help make the world safe for Teacher Sex Scandals by Tweeting me @jerrythornton1.