Huff Po – And after the party is the hotel lobby, and — damn it, Ronnie. Police arrested 31-year-old Ronnie Lee Warfield after he allegedly pulled down his pants in a Charleston, S.C. hotel lobby and defecated on the floor, WCIV reports. When officers arrived at 3:45 a.m. on Sunday, they found a “large quantity of fecal matter” just outside the bathroom at the Francis Marion Hotel. WCIV reports. An officer walked into the bathroom and found Warfield cleaning himself in one of the stalls; the door was open and he was exposed to anyone walking in, according to the report. “I didn’t mean to do it,” Warfield reportedly told the officer. “I couldn’t hold it.” The report states Warfield was detained once he had put his pants back on, and another officer talked to the hotel’s night auditor about what she saw. Warfield reportedly interrupted them, telling the hotel employee: “I can clean it up.” Instead, officers took him to jail on charges of public defecation and indecent exposure.
Show me a man who says he’s never been in this situation and I’ll show you a liar. Every red blooded man has been in a position at 3:45am where you “couldn’t hold it.” Its not like anybody ever really means to shit on the floor of a hotel lobby. Its just that they find themselves in a situation where they have to shit on the floor of a hotel lobby.
You’re probably a hundred beers deep. Maybe you have a White Castle sack of ten in your stomach. There’s a storm brewing in your colon and your sphincter simply can’t hold its ground. Its like a small crack in the Hoover Dam that eventually ripples throughout the whole wall and then BOOM – open the floodgates. Doesn’t matter whether you’re sitting over a bowl or standing in the lobby of the Waldorf Astoria. Your body is about to take a shit.
Most people would probably just shit their pants rather than drop a load on the floor in public but who knows. Maybe that guy was wearing his favorite pair of pants.