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No One Has Ever Been Higher At A Celtics Game Than This Man

This is the kind of thing you don’t get when you live in Boston. I had my League Pass on early, waiting for Celtics-Pistons to start and the camera suddenly panned to this legend. Guy just fucking RIPPED out of his mind eating what I can only describe as the world’s supply of chicken tenders. I don’t even think the Garden sells that I’m pretty sure buddy just pulled a Ron Swanson and demanded they jam all the tenders they sell into a popcorn tub. Zero percent chance this guy knows a basketball game is about to take place. He absolutely thinks he’s sitting on his couch and can change the channel whenever he pleases. The only troubling thing I see here is an abhorrent lack of sauce. That’s far too many tenders to plow through sans sauce I don’t care how high he is that’s utter savagery.