Eric and Jessie James Decker Retire From the Patriots
Whelp. While Eric Decker’s abrupt retirement might have been unexpected, it’s not a shock. As a general rule when you’re a veteran taking late in the 4th quarter of the third preseason game, it’s probably best if you have a tenant-at-will rental and not a 30-year mortgage if you know what I’m saying. Flat out he was terrible for the few weeks he was in New England. Granted he didn’t have much time to learn the offense, but still. He had hands like oven mitts and was never going to gain his quarterback’s trust. So what began as a signing that gave a lot of us hope just ends up being another name on the Wall of Shame of talented receivers who came to the Patriots and couldn’t catch on. Guys like Doug Gabriel, Joey Galloway, Ochocinco, Reggie Wayne and so on. It’s sad, but we’re used to it.
The greatest tragedy of all is that Mrs. Decker will not get to take her rightful place in the pantheon of super attractive Patriots wives and girlfriends. So let’s send them off with a tribute to Jessie James Decker. Goodnight and godspeed you two. We hardly knew ye.
Cheers bitches A post shared by Jessie James Decker (@jessiejamesdecker) on