Shorty’s Cheesesteaks. I’ve heard from many people that this was the best of the best this damn city has to offer. Even my main biddy Solana(?) is giving rave reviews of her meat. How was it? Spoiler Alert: Awful.
Solana!!! Why must you smite thee??? Screw it being a bad cheesesteak, that was legitimately one of the worst meals I’ve ever had. And, no, I did not go back and wreck havoc on Shorty’s kitchen like I said to Solana. Since consuming that street-like meat I haven’t stopped sweating and my stomach has been doing hula-hoops around my ass. At least they got the aftershock of a true cheesesteak right. Regardless, shout out to sick little Nate for using his spot to eat. And yes, I fully expect to walk in tomorrow to a dead rat hanging from a noose at my desk because of this. You don’t dangle bait under the bridge for the Troll to bite.