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I Would Rather Get Speared To Death By Goldberg Than Play The Mets In A 7 Game Series

You might think I’m being dramatic about preferring Death By Goldberg Spear over a 7-game series against the Mets. But truthfully I am not exaggerating one bit. The Mets 1-2 punch mixed with this lineup of destiny managed and operated by the legendary Buck Showalter. What we saw in those 5 games was quite literally complete dominance in every sense of the words Complete Dominance. You might think that it’s insignificant because there’s lot of season left, it’s only August, the Braves are defending champs, etc. So many reasons to tell me to shut up and calm down or whatever. But doing so would ignore the baseball we watched and the futility of the Braves in their season’s most important series.

On the other end is Bill Goldberg spearing me to death. Not some mild concussion or a separated shoulder. I’m talking full blown death at the hands of 20th century MONSTER. A man so violent and powerful that he didn’t even need the internet to become an overnight phenomenon. Back when Viral transcended the mechanics of algorithms and the covert wants of the Chinese government. To make it big back then was a completely different ball game.

On one hand I could be in the NLCS or World Series against the Mets. On the other hand I could be incapacitated at the hands of my childhood’s most dominating wrestler. Nobody gets out of here alive so excuse me if I’m inclined to take the quick and painless death of a Bill Goldberg-lowered-shoulder to my sternum. If that makes me an asshole then so be it. You don’t get to tell me how I value my personal icons 25 years after the fact.

In other news I understand not everybody knows and loves Goldberg. A lot of people do. But not everybody which is sad because that wasn’t always the case.

That’s why I encourage you to check out todays starting 9 with the man myth legend. It’s just the boys chopping up fitness and life and work and family. He’s one of a kind and a treat to interview. Check it out here:

And if that doesn’t work, then jackhammer some highlights.

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