SAFTB Industries Desperately Needs Your Help To Keep The Lights On

SAFTB Industries was a once proud organization but now, due to a severe lack of funding, we find ourselves inching closer and closer to Chapter 11 each day. Our enemies, MASSIVE pop stars, have seen that we are weak and spent the fall trying to steal our newest creation. Please take our 20% off and help us build back. We just want to come up with more ideas to make everyone rich and also we want to hire children again. 

Get the brand new, incredibly comfortable sweatpants

Corduroy hats that everyone has been asking me about for months and I didn't know they weren't on sale

Patch hats that I also didn't know weren't on sale  

All the cool kids smoke Banana Cigs if you don't at least pretend (also available in a hoodie)

Work jackets that you gotta be wearing in the factory 

Anoraks (fancy word for rain jacket) 

Season 1 hoodie available in all colors

Season II hoodie in all colors 

It's Lying hoodie available in all colors 

Premium beanie from the set of the life aquatic 

Pocket tee's that are just like a certain very popular blue collar company

Tote bags for fancy sad boys

Sad Girl Season cuz girls get sad too