Breaking Up Via Text Message Should Be Socially Acceptable

Its 2017 folks. We are minimizing human interaction in every form. We are on the path to completely eliminating face to face interaction. We contact each other via 10 second video bursts. We’re on the verge of rolling out robots. We are literally about to all buy fuck robots, and yet people still expect a face to face meeting to break up? Thats just asinine. Lets set up a face to face meeting so I can let you know I never want to meet you face to face ever again! Lets ruin your entire evening, ruin your dinner, all so I can awkwardly sit there and say right in your mug “I choose to live a life which you are not a part of.” Do you get up and leave on the spot? Do you stay and answer questions? Provide closure? Do you try to comfort him or her if they start crying? You dont want to be rude but youre definitely doing the single most rude thing in the world. Thats what it boils down to – when you break up with someone, for some inexplicable reason, you expect that person to “understand” and kind of let you off the hook. Meanwhile you’re basically just deciding “My life is better when you are just not in it AT ALL.” How on earth can you expect that to go any other way other than ATROCIOUS?

And why on earth would the person getting dumped want to be in on this either? People lose sleep over hypothetical situations where they get embarrassed. Public speaking and public humiliation and shit like that are at the top of everyone’s list as far as crippling phobias. And you’re going to INSIST that if someone wants to break up with you that they drag you somewhere in public and drop a nuclear atom bomb right on your head? Thats some masochistic shit.

In like 99% of relationships that are about to end, the people involved are ready for it. They know its coming. Just shoot them a text. Clean break. No public humiliation. No awkwardness. Nobody wasting their time or ruining a meal. And everyone moves on with their lives.