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If You're an American Who Cares About the Royal Family, You Are the Biggest Cuck in Existence

On this week's Macrodosing, we talked about some of the prevalent conspiracy theories surrounding the British Royal Family. I went along with the topic as a good podcast member does, but at some point I had to just unleash my true thoughts about the British Royals. Or more specifically, Americans who care about them.

If you were born in the greatest country in the world — which, oh by the way, defeated Great Britain in a war because Queen Elizabeth's great-great-great-grandfather was one of the most tyrannical assholes to ever live — and you choose to devote time and energy thinking about what Kate Middleton did today, you are a cuck of the highest order. I'd go so far as to say anyone who has actively sought out happenings with the Royal Family on more than, say, five occasions should not be able to obtain an American passport. You've chosen your side and it's the one that came in second place in the Revolutionary War.

As I said in the clip, if you were interested 25 years ago when they were possibly killing off ex-wives, that's one thing. But if you're tuning in to watch Oprah get the latest gossip from Meghan Markle, just go enjoy your tea and crumpets across the pond. You belong to them now.

Check out the rest of this week's episode to find out if the Royal Family is actually full of vampires and where Kyrie Irving ranks on the list of best players in the NBA.