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Am I The Asshole If I Get The COVID-19 Vaccine Because I Am Fat?

On today's Podfathers, I decided to ask the question countless other people of my ilk are thinking. Is it okay to get the COVID-19 vaccine under the new standards in some states like New York that list severe obesity on the list of underlying conditions?

  • Cancer (current or in remission, including 9/11-related cancers)
  • Chronic kidney disease
  • Pulmonary Disease, including but not limited to, COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease), asthma (moderate-to-severe), pulmonary fibrosis, cystic fibrosis, and 9/11 related pulmonary diseases
  • Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities including Down Syndrome
  • Heart conditions, including but not limited to heart failure, coronary artery disease, cardiomyopathies, or hypertension (high blood pressure)
  • Immunocompromised state (weakened immune system) including but not limited to solid organ transplant or from blood or bone marrow transplant, immune deficiencies, HIV, use of corticosteroids, use of other immune weakening medicines, or other causes
  • Severe Obesity (BMI 40 kg/m2), Obesity (body mass index [BMI] of 30 kg/m2 or higher but < 40 kg/m2)
  • Pregnancy
  • Sickle cell disease or Thalassemia
  • Type 1 or 2 diabetes mellitus 
  • Cerebrovascular disease (affects blood vessels and blood supply to the brain)
  • Neurologic conditions including but not limited to Alzheimer's Disease or dementia
  • Liver disease

I don't know what my BMI is but I can tell you blindly without a doubt it is well above 40 (especially after Quarantine Clem ate Keto Clem), it might be a perfect 100, and could even be infinity plus infinity times infinity for all I know. So I'm pretty sure I check that box.

I want to get the vaccine so it's one less person that needs to be vaccinated which means one teeny tiny baby step to the world getting normal again and so I don't have to worry about catching a virus that has clocked in as "Absolutely terrible" to "A fucking nightmare" from my coworkers that have had it. But I also don't want to take a vaccine from a person that has any of the conditions on that list. I get that being bigger can impact my chances of checking into a hospital without checking out. But I don't think having a fat ass should give you the same vaccine privileges as someone that has dealt with cancer, Alzheimer's, sickle cell, or anything else on that list.

My answer is I don't want to cut anybody who needs the vaccine more than I do, which is pretty much everyone else on that list, while also not wanting to read that a bunch of vaccines got chucked because they expired. I pretty much just want to be put on standby for a flight. I won't hop in line when they call Zone 1 or Zone 2 despite having a Zone 9 ticket. But I just want a chance to get a vaccine if one becomes available. They can even give me one that fell on the floor or that got pricked into someone who then chickened out and left. I don't care. I just don't want schmucks like this to be vaccinated before pretty much everyone else on the planet.

In other news about big fellas, Large and I discuss a new project we are going to be doing with Coach Duggs, discuss the first ever baby named after a Barstool employee, answer a couple of mailbag questions including which movie scene went completely over your head as a kid until you grew up, and wrap things up with a hilarious story about one of Large's kids.