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Everybody Is Awful: Facebook Posts

Highlights from this week's episode: 

A woman is bragging on FB about moving in with her boyfriend. (6:46 - 10:00)

Jim has had nightmares moving into apartments with women. (10:20 - 23:50)

"I Remember the first girl I moved in with, in the first week, I was shitting at the fuckin' Shell gas station up the street. The guy at the gas station was like, don’t you have your own bathroom? I tell the guy, I said listen …I just moved in with my chick, I’m tryna figure this out." 

“I guess they got all these online personality tests (on FB) - and this one woman, now this is an adult woman in her 40’s …Don sent this in. She did a personality test, “What would Santa have to say about you?” 

"First of all there is no Santa, so he would say nothing. He would say nothing. If you are talking to a 9-year old, then you fill this out. You don’t want to ruin it for him. But this woman is in her 40’s. I have a feeling Santa isn’t going to badmouth someone on this test” (34:37)

“I saw a picture of a guy and his girl on top of a mountain, with a great view in the background of course. And he wrote, “So this is what we did before 8 am this morning , what did you do?” - What a dick." 

"Way to rub it in that you got up early and got some exercise in. What did I do this morning? I slept in, and had a vivid dream I was fuckin' Scarlett Johansson. I’d say my morning was better, I don’t know?” (39:00) 

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