The Five Types Of New York Jets Fans
New York Jets fans have endured unhealthy amounts of misery through the years. What type of people now populate this fanbase? We have went ahead and broke them into five categories for you. For more on the team many are projecting to be the worst in the NFL, read here.
Category 1 – The Defiant Optimist: These are similar to the Knicks fans who thought Phil Jackson had a master five dimensional chess plan and the Knicks were only bad because of the media. These fans think there is sound logic to every Jets decision ever made and the media is exaggerating how bad they are, even though they haven’t made the playoffs in six years. Every mid to late round pick is a budding superstar. Every free agent signing was done at the perfect price and for the perfect reason. Matt Simms had the genes to be a great starter. Greg McElroy was a WINNER! Kellen Clemens had the intangibles and arm to be a top tier starter! Muhammad Wilkerson and Leonard Williams are tied for the second best defensive lineman in the NFL behind JJ Watt and Mike Maccagnan is arguably the top personnel guy in the NFL. STOP HATIN!
Category 2 – The Wallowing Pessimist: The opposite end of the spectrum from category number one. They take a perverse pleasure in the Jets being bad, deliberately do not enjoy the seasons that are actually positive and overreach to criticize ridiculous things, when there are perfectly rational things to criticize. This group is more sad than anything else and believe a curse hangs over the franchise and things that happened in the 1970s have a direct impact on today’s incompetence. This level of miserable will not even be able to enjoy if/when the Jets actually win a Super Bowl, they will simply say “whatever, we still have less than the Giants, bro.” They are also probably huge Joe Benigno fans. These are the people who would rather be right about the team being awful and always being awful, rather than seeing the team actually be competent.
Category 3 – The Apathetic Wanderer: A person who says they are a Jets fan but only has a cursory interest in the team and will slide into category 1 or category 2 depending on the season. This is the person who was wearing a FitzMagic shirt in 2015 and was loudly talking up the team but then wore a Steelers jersey to a home game in 2016 because Antonio Brown is on their fantasy team. This person thinks Brandon Marshall is still on the team and doesn’t know the name of any of the coordinators. This is also the guy who swears he has the greatest tailgate that you need to check out and when you show up has five guys standing around a Toyota Camry drinking warm Natural Light listening to a shitty new rap album.
Category 4 – The Look At Me Showboat: The fan who overdoes it without ever actually understanding much of what is going on. This is the guy who gets in a brawl in the second quarter of a preseason game against the Giants in front of a bunch of 10 year olds because somebody said Christian Hackenberg sucks. This is the guy who designs his own fan character, dresses up elaborately but then walks into the stadium halfway through the first quarter and leaves right after halftime. They constantly scream at other people they aren’t “REAL” fans but haven’t sat through a game from start to finish in ten years. On Twitter, they constantly tweet directly at the NY Jets, Woody Johnson or player handles like saying “you suck, sell the team loser! @woodyjohnson4″ is going to change anything.
Category 5 – The Smug Know It All Blogger Who Tries To Balance Being An Optimist and Pessimist But Is Just As Annoying As Every Other Jets Fan: I’ll see myself out…