I Am Looking To Win Back To Back US Opens 1 Week From Today At Pebble Beach

As everybody probably already knows I am the defending US Open Champion. Last year I shot an astounding -16 at Shinnecock. (I shot -4 for my round so if you multiply that times 4 that’s -16) Well this year I am back to defend my title at Pebble Beach. Now I know what people are thinking. Hey Pres what do you have left to prove? You already showed that you are the best amateur golfer on the planet. How many times can you embarrasses the USGA? Well friends this time the rules have changed. Unlike last year when I had unlimited mulligans now I have only 12 mulligans per hole. This obviously changes things dramatically. I need to shoot at least 1 under to win the title. To be honest Im not nearly as confident as I was last year. This is much closer to a pick em than a sure thing. But there is just something about my competitive spirit and rising to the occasion that makes me think I’ll come out victorious again. Either way we’ll find out 1 week from today. Oh and Zah is going to be in Zimbabwe so I have replaced him with Glenny and Big Ev to retrieve my balls. No word on whether Vegas has set a line on whether I win or either of those fatzos die.