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I Just Want To Listen To Don Cherry Talk About Fishing Forever

It’s so simple. It’s so pure. It’s everything I want during an intermission report in the middle of a hockey game. Fuckin’ Grapes coming in here during game 7 of a series which most people believe would determine who goes to the Stanley Cup Final from the Western Conference, and he just starts flexing on everybody about this big ass catfish he once caught with his son.

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It’s why the biggest regret in my life, the thing that keeps me up at night the most, is the fact that Don isn’t my grandfather. Could you imagine family gatherings with him at the head of the table? You’re sitting there during Christmas dinner and you’ve got Grandpa Grapes bitching about PK Subban trying out for the diving team

And then he slams on the brakes and transitions right into snagging some monster catfish on the Red River. Somebody actually gets to live that life and I couldn’t be more jealous of them. And you know what? Don brings up a pretty great point. He catches and releases like a man. The fans in Nashville should be ashamed of themselves for killing all of them like that. Did the Predators throw game 7 on purpose just so they could preserve the catfish population in Nashville? You can’t rule it out is all I’m saying.

Meanwhile here in the United States, this is what we get during the intermission reports.

roenick-jets

Don’t get me wrong. America is the greatest country in the world. Freedom and all that shit. If I had to do it all again, I’d pick living in the US of A 1000 times out of 1000. But when it comes to intermission reports, Coach’s Corner beats the shit out of NBCSN and it’s not even close.

TFW they think they got big catfish.

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@BarstoolJordie