Thinkin Bout Letting My Ass Breathe A Little This Summer SZN In These 168 Dollar Britches

I’m tired of dealing with swamp ass. SICK OF IT! Each summer I think about how the ladies are so lucky. They can wear their flowing summer dresses with the wind breezing up their butts while the men of the world deal with swamp ass and thigh rubbing. It’s very unfair and another example of this female-dominated society that we are living in. The Amazons of the world dont just control your shopping with 2-day deliveries, folks.

I long for the days that I can throw on a breezy little number and saunter sexily around the city. (interesting take on an alliteration by me. Different letters but same sound. Incredible.) But, wearing a dress is still frowned upon in our society. For now, I will have to settle on these britches which will let my buttcheeks freely flow withoutst a care in the world. Gone are the days of swamp suits. Gone are the days of gold bond. Here are the days of air flow down below. The best part? Only 168 dollars. Utah, give me two.