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Dustin Byfuglien Is The Biggest Common Man In The NHL And We Should All Feel Lucky That The Jets Don't Suck Anymore

“Movin’ our feet and got on the puck and… shit happens” – Dustin Byfuglien

Obviously I’m going to be a little biased here but I think we can all agree that out of all professional athletes, hockey players are the most normal dudes. I mean you definitely have your bizarre creatures here and there like Sidney Crosby who is a robot specifically designed to play hockey and nothing else. But by and large, professional hockey players seem like a group of regular ass guys you could hang out with at a bar and just have a regular ass time. Nothing more, nothing less.

But out of everybody in the National Hockey League, I think the guy who would make the best addition to any crew is Dusty Buff. I feel like most crews already have their own version of Dustin Byfuglien. The big guy who eats and drinks more than everybody else in the crew. You can usually catch him going tarps off about 15 minutes into any sort of social gathering, constantly toeing the line between busting balls and being the biggest dickhead you’ve ever met. Evander Kane knows what I’m talking about.


He’s a bully’s bully. And you love him for it because “ahhh that’s just Big Buff. He’s a character but he means well, I promise. He’ll grow on ya, don’t worry”. But while your crew may already have your own version of Dustin Byfuglien, I can assure you that he’s not popping home 2 goals in one period in the Stanley Cup Playoffs.

He’s a big, lovable ogre and what makes everything better is the fact that Winnipeg is nasty this year. For the last 7 or 8 years or so, we really haven’t been able to see Dustin Byfuglien on the national scene. After he won a Cup with the Blackhawks in 2010, he moved on to the Atlanta Thrashers in 2010-11. Then once the Thrashers moved up to Winnipeg, they’ve only been in the playoffs once and they got swept in the first round. So unless you were really paying attention to the Winnipeg Jets during the regular season, you never really had a great opportunity to see Buff go to work. That is, of course, until this year. Winnipeg has a 2-1 series lead over Nashville right now and the consensus here is that whoever ends up coming out of this series will win the Western Conference (even though those bastards in Vegas keep winning). So not only is this a huge year for the Winnipeg Jets, but it’s a huge year for Dustin Byfuglien to become everybody’s favorite bully.

How can you not love this guy?