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An Actually Credible Report Says Brady is Planning Passing Workouts With His Receivers

Mike FlorioTom Brady hasn’t specifically said that he’s playing football in 2018. Maybe he doesn’t need to. Maybe actions send a stronger message than anything he could say.

Consider this fact: Per a source with knowledge of the situation, Brady already has made arrangements to get together with some of his teammates between the end of the offseason program and the start of training camp in order to better prepare for the season to come.

And this is how you make sense of a non-report report the gist of which is:

New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady still has not committed to playing in 2018, even though people who know him believe he will be back for the coming season. …

The lack of any official word from Brady, either privately or publicly, has left some to admit that, while they do believe he will play in 2018, they cannot say that for sure.

Better yet, this is how you drill a hole in the Adam Schefter doublespeak posing as news, pack if full of C-4 and blast it to the stratosphere like Mythbusters blowing up a cement mixer. By looking at Tom Brady’s actual actions.

Where is the GOAT going to be this summer? Running passing camps with his teammates. Including, according to Scott Zolak, Rob Gronkowski. They’ll all be heading to Brady’s ranch in Montana. And where was the GOAT just last fucking week? At the Patriots facility, in their practice bubble, working throwing drills with Julian Edelman. Are these the actions of a guy who’s already moved onto his new career as office manager of TB12 Fitness?

Trust me as a guy who made a recent career change. When I had one foot out the door of the Massachusetts court system, I wasn’t spending my off work time rehearsing my “All RISE!” and trying to improve my jury impanelment skills. I was O-U-T out.

As Life Coach Thornton tells all my friends and loved ones, there are precious few times in your life you get to spend as a short timer at a job you’re leaving. Where the things you hated about your employment aren’t your problem any more. You make the most of those. You mentally and emotionally check out knowing that when your two weeks notice is up, all that bullshit is a part of someone else’s life, not yours. And you laugh at those suckers on your way out the door.

If Brady were truly done, the last thing he’d be doing is throwing footballs. Or throwing warning shots across Stephen Gostkowski’s bow from the beaches of Qatar:

If Brady was really done, truly sick of the game, the last thing he’d be doing is anything involving footballs. He’d have his feet up somewhere, pour himself a giant frosty mug of the carbs and malted hops he’s been avoiding, and clear the mechanism. He wouldn’t be organizing route tree drills with his skill guys.

But I get it. I get Adam Schefter saying “People who know Brady says he’s playing but it’s possible he won’t” because it’s clickbait Unobtainium. It’s actually not saying anything, but all anyone will hear or repeat is the second part. It’s like saying to your dog “I’m having a difficult time finishing my tax returns but DO YOU WANT TO GO FOR A WALK???” All he comprehends  is the second part because it’s all he gives a shit about. Which is why this report in which Schefter literally said every, single sign points to Brady returning is being taken as something other than Brady returning.

In a related note, people close to Gal Godot believe that there is no way in God’s green Earth that she’ll sleep with me. But she hasn’t publicly said she won’t sleep with me. So take that to mean what you will.

P.S. Gotham Chopra can fuck right off with this stuff. He doesn’t have to speak for his buddy, but he needs to know how the forces of evil in the press are going to spin this.