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Oh My. Guy, In Florida, On Meth, Tried to Give His Son an Exorcism


GAD - A Florida man high on meth who was arrested in a violent confrontation with police after dragging his son into the woods reportedly believed the 11-year-old required an exorcism. ‘You are the demon, you are the demon,’ authorities say Bryan Adams told his son after taking him from his bedroom. ‘I know what I must do with you.’ Okeechobee County police say the 31-year-old showed ‘no compliance or showing of pain and abnormal strength.’ I know what I must do': Adams was reportedly high on meth and believed his 11-year-old was possessed, so he took him to the woods while spouting ominous nonsense Police say they grabbed the boy, who was unharmed, but when they went for Adams, he bolted into the soggy underbrush. ‘I then observed Bryan getting up off the ground and lunging at Deputy Hazy. Bryan then turned around and began punching me in the chest with both hands,’ Deputy Leland Schoonmaker. ‘One wrist did have a handcuff on it and he was swinging it around as he was punching me.’ During the confrontation, police say Adams repeated: ‘I have to stop the demons. I have to do it.’ Adams began to hit the dog even as officers used a Taser on him. He was finally restrained after Deputy Mark Margerum reatliated against the crazed man’s onslaught and ‘… punched Bryan in the face approximately five times with [his] right hand.’


When I saw his face and said “oh my” outloud probably 10 times. Goodness gracious. Does meth grow on trees in Florida? I am legitimately concerned about that state. Not even as a joke anymore, I think they need a state-wide intervention. Get your shit together, you inbreds. It’s bananas. Not to say crazy shit doesn’t happen elsewhere. In fact, a woman did an exorcism last week in Maryland. So are exorcisms hot in the streets now? I am trying to figure it out. I know I don’t want one. But I’m scared they are going to gain popularity. We’ve seen the dumb shit that gets popular for no reason. Pokemon, bath salts, going outside. And now exorcisms? Am I going to be at ATown this weekend and be offered one? Legit worried.

PS: That’s how you mugshot. Take notes, idiot Canadian children.