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Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher


PennsylvaniaA former substitute administrative aide and teacher at Unionville High School was led from a Chester County courtroom in handcuffs Wednesday after being sentenced to prison by a judge who said she lived in a “fantasy world” of denying having sexual contact with two students.

“You don’t want to grow up,” Common Pleas Court Judge Patrick Carmody told Sheri Maufort before handing down an 11½ to 23-month term in Chester County Prison, a compromise between what the prosecution and defense had asked for in the case. “You have Peter Pan syndrome.” …

Addressing the two victims, [Assistant DA Erin] O’Brien said that they had indeed suffered, even though such a relationship with an older woman might seem to some like a “badge of honor” for a teenage boy. …

In the first instance, testimony showed that Maufort went to a party that was held at a student’s home following a football game. She met up with an 18-year-old who was at the party, drove him to a secluded spot away from the house, kissed him, and touched his groin through his pants. The youth, who then went back to the party, testified that he had told several friends at the party about the incident, although he exaggerated the actual level of sexual contact.

Later that night, according to testimony, Maufort contacted a 17-year-old who was friends with her daughter and who she had planned to hire to play music at a party at another student’s home. She drove him from his house to the parking lot of the Blue Pear Restaurant in Dilworthtown. There, they drank beer and sat in a grassy area, and she performed oral sex on him, he testified.

The episode ended when Maufort’s husband, Rocky Maufort, drove to the scene and met the pair after finding that his wife was not at home. Rocky Maufort testified that he then gave the youth a ride home.

I’m asking a lot from Sheri Maufort. It’s not easy to ask anyone to walk in the footprints of an instant legend like Brittany “I Want” Zamora. To follow an all time Hall of Famer like that is unfair to a regular, garden variety Sex Scandal Teacher like her. In Boston sports terms, she’s Yaz taking over from Ted Williams. Pete Carroll having to follow Bill Parcells.


I could’ve picked any number of candidates sitting in my in box right now. But none of them seemed worthy. What Sheri lacks in natural talent, she makes up for in pure fire and determination. She’s got that intangible quality that tells you she’ll stand up and be counted when the lights burn brightest. So thanks to her. And hopefully things can get back to normal next week.

The Grades:
Looks: Remember the least funny person to ever work at Dunder-Mifflin? I do.
Grade: C-

Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: While we don’t have any of the usual markers like intercourse, sext messages, classroom beejs and the like, pulling two separate students away from house parties to mack on them in the same night is quite an impressive accomplishment. And kind of quaintly old school. Like it’s probably the way teachers used to give beaners to their students on grassy areas behind restaurants back in the 1950s.
Grade: B

Intangibles: So how did that small talk between Rocky Maufort and that kid go? “So … uh, my wife just blew you. That’s got to be something, huh? Have you gotten head from any of the other teachers?” That’s The Rocky Maufort Picture Show, for sure.
Grade: A

Overall: C. Still, good try. Good effort.

Do you have someone you want to see graded? Tweet her to me @jerrythornton1 or email me at jerry@barstoolsports.com. Your service to the betterment of mankind will be its own reward.