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The New L.A. Rams Stadium Is Reportedly Projected To Cost About $5 BILLION

So for everyone wondering why an owner would move an NFL team, rip the guts out of an entire city, and cause their poor fans to rely on a goldfish to pick their new favorite team, there is your answer. Stan Kroenke gets to build his next NFL stadium with one of those cheat codes from The Sims that gives you unlimited money. Most fun shit in the world. Diamond seats. Platinum urinals. The ceiling is the roof for what the Rams can do with that prime L.A. real estate. Stunt on the haters for a minute, Stanley.

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I remember when Jerruh’s World was the gold standard for excess and that cost a grand total of $1.3 billion. The Rams stadium is expected to be more than three (3) times that. Granted it’s in L.A. instead of Texas. But my peasant brain cannot even contemplate what $5 billion can buy. Like I imagine the price of a real life Jurassic Park would cost about $5 billion and that housed an entire gaggle of dinosaurs, albeit with subpar security measures. This stadium will host 16 or so football games a year (the Chargers will play there too), some concerts, maybe a WWE PPV, the occasional Super Bowl/Final Four/World Cup, and act as a spot for bougie L.A. parties.

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I did some research (read: Went to Wikipedia) to figure out what the fuck all that money was being spent on.

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69 suites? Stan, you goddamn dog, you! And look at the shit going around the stadium:

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A casino? A shopping center? A lake? A fucking LAKE?!? Kronk Daddy got enough money to make a real life lake just for shits and giggles? Fuck The Sims. This is Sim City 2000. I was angry enough that the Giants and Jets built the boringest stadium ever in New fucking Jersey and an indoor ski slope nobody asked for at the cool price of $1.6 billion. Now I am straight up pissed off.

P.S. I sure hope the Rams have a better turn out for Week 1 of the new stadium than they had at Week 1 of last season.