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I Can't Tell If I Love Or Hate The Anaheim Ducks For Completely Ruining 3-on-3 Overtime In The NHL

You play to win the game. That’s the only thing that matters, right? Like what the fuck would you be out there for if your only goal wasn’t to win the game? So last night against the Edmonton Oilers, the Anaheim Ducks realized that the best chance they had of winning in 3v3 overtime would be to make sure Connor McDavid doesn’t even have a chance of touching the puck.

It makes sense. He’s quite possibly the best player in the world. At the very least, he’s a top 3 player in the world. Outside of Connor McDavid and his league-leading 99 points this year, the Edmonton Oilers suck a pretty liberal amount of ass. We’re not just talking one or two asses here, ya know? We’re talking copious amounts of anus.

So when the overtime period starts and the Ducks are out there against McDavid, they waste over a minute of the period just cycling the puck around in their own zone and playing keep away. Hockey fans have been jerking their dicks to 3v3 overtime over the last few years since it’s been introduced to the game. It’s fast paced. It’s exciting. It’s the way that hockey is supposed to be played. And the Anaheim Ducks just pulled down their pants and shit all over it with that display. But the moment McJesus got off the ice for a line change? Anaheim casually strolls down the other end of the ice and about 10 seconds later it’s in the back of the net and they get the win. They spent a full minute of the game being terrified to let Connor McDavid even see the puck, and then they score 10 seconds after he gets off the ice. I don’t know if I can hate on that.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s a chicken shit move for sure. But it’s brilliant at the same time. They basically just went down the entire Oilers’ organization saying “fuck you” over and over again to everybody besides McDavid. He’s cool. Just said to them, “listen. You fellas are an absolute joke besides this one kid who may or may not be the son of Hockey Jesus and the only reason he’s on your shit show of a team is because you guys got so good at sucking”. Then proceeded to own their ass after the monologue was done. Was the first minute of this overtime boring as hell and a disgrace to the game? Sure. But were the next 15 seconds hilarious and the best possible metaphor for how much of a clown Pete Chiarelli is? Absolutely. And for that… I actually love the move.