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Out Of All The Butts In The World, Mike Francesa's Is The Most Hurt Over Jason Kelce's Parade Speech

Devastating news here as Mike Francesa is apparently battling a massive case of hemorrhoids after Jason Kelce decided to display a little emotion after bringing the first Super Bowl ever to the city of Philadelphia. Nobody should ever have to go through this level of butt-hurtedness. It’s terrible to see. My thoughts go out to Mike, his family and his friends as they all try to recover here. I simply cannot imagine the horror. Mike Francesa had to turn off the radio in his car because he simply could not take it anymore.

Are you that fragile that you can’t handle another grown adult showing some emotion and using curse words while up on stage? And don’t even give me that excuse about the kids. Get real, bozo. As long as you’re not deaf, you’re going to hear the word “fuck” at some point throughout pretty much every day. As long as you’re not blind, you’re going to see the word “fuck” at some point throughout pretty much every day. If you’re deaf and you’re blind… well then I’m sorry to hear that but you’re also probably not reading this blog right now. All I’m saying is that it’s a word that expresses an emotion. It’s not a word that is going to turn your kids into criminals and crack heads immediately upon hearing it. If you’re a parent and you don’t want your children using that language then it’s on you to make that happen. You don’t get to tell everybody else to tone it down.

And really, Mike? Really? If you were Jeffrey Lurie you would cut Jason Kelce for cursing after he just won a Super Bowl? Buddy. There are guys in the NFL who have been hit with domestic abuse allegations. There are guys in the NFL who have been arrested on multiple occasions. I’d say the majority of these guys have all remained with their respective teams. So if cursing on a stage is where you want to draw the line then go ahead and be my guest. I just hope you’re ready to stay consistent.

Philly has been starved for a Super Bowl championship for decades and decades. Can’t just let some blowhard from New York act like he has any right to tell us what and what’s not an acceptable way for us to celebrate finally getting one.

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P.S. – TBT

@BarstoolJordie