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Aaron Gordon Has Withdrawn From The Dunk Contest With A Strained Hip Flexor (UPDATE: He Has Been Replaced By Donovan Mitchell)

MOTHERFUCKER. How is the Dunk Contest going to be saved without Aaron Gordon in it? Can’t we just let Aaron rest up the next week or so and maybe quietly do some Russian Olympian steroids before we officially rule him out? Suspend him a few games for said steroids even. The Magic can continue to be the worst team in the NBA without him and that will only help their tanking efforts. But the Dunk Contest needs him. You don’t just replace a guy who can do this kind of shit.

Woj Grenade Update As I Write This:

Lets take a quick look at Donovan’s resume…

Yup, we gucci. Maybe Mitchell will save the Dunk Contest instead! Get better Aaron (but if you still want to do that steroids plan, let me know. I’m pretty sure we can get Adam Silver to green light a 5 man contest).