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8-Year-Old Feminist Gets Survival Book Taken Off Shelves Because She Thinks It's Sexist


BS BLOG – Writer Constance Cooper says she was checking out a bookstore with her family recently when her eight-year-old daughter made an unhappy discovery. She’d found a pair of books called “How to Survive (Almost) Anything,” with one for “Boys Only” and the other for “Girls Only.” The boys’ book had tips like “How to Survive a Sinking Ship” and “How to Survive in a Desert.” But the girls’ book included stereotypical advice like “How to Survive a Fashion Disaster” and “How to Teach Your Cat to Sit.”



How to Survive a Shark Attack
How to Survive in a Forest
How to Survive Frostbite
How to Survive a Plane Crash
How to Survive in a Desert
How to Avoid a Polar Bear Attack
How to Survive a Flash Flood
How to Treat a Broken Leg
How to Survive an Earthquake
How to Survive a Forest Fire
How to Survive in a Whiteout
How to Survive a Zombie Invasion
How to Survive a Snake Bite
How to Survive If Your Parachute Fails
How to Survive a Croc Attack
How to Survive a Lightning Strike
How to Survive a T-Rex
How to Survive Whitewater Rapids
How to Survive a Sinking Ship
How to Survive a Vampire Attack
How to Survive an Avalanche
How to Survive a Tornado
How to Survive Quicksand
How to Survive a Fall
How to Survive a Swarm of Bees
How to Survive in Space


How to Survive a BFF Fight
How to Survive Football Trials
How to Survive a Breakout
How to Show You’re Sorry
How to Have the Best Sleepover Ever
How to Look Your Best for a Party
How to Survive Siblings
Scary Survival Dos and Don’ts
How to Handle Becoming Rich
How to Keep Stuff Secret
How to Survive Tests
How to Survive Shyness
How to Handle Sudden Stardom
More Stardom Survival Tips
How to Survive a Camping Trip
How to Survive a Fashion Disaster
How to Teach Your Cat to Sit
How to Turn a No into a Yes
Top Tips for Speech-making
How to Survive Embarrassment
How to Create a Diversion
How to Survive a Crush
Seaside Survival
How to Soothe Sunburn
How to Pick Perfect Sunglasses
Surviving a Zombie Attack
How to Spot a Frenemy
Brilliant Boredom Busters
How to Survive Truth or Dare
How to Beat Bullies
How to Be a Brilliant Baby-Sitter

First off, every man should have a copy of the guy’s version. Should be as standard as a bible in the hotel room. Personally I plan on surviving more than one plane crash and polar bear attack in this lifetime because that’s what men do. Plus it’s the only survival guide to instruct you how to grow wings when your parachute fails and fart oxygen to survive in space. Can’t teach that in any classroom.

But get this little bitch, who I’m sure had NO influence distinguishing this book was sexist by her mother. What girl that doesn’t putt from the rough doesn’t want to learn “How to Have the Best Sleepover” or “How to Survive a Crush”? Hey, toots, we’re living in a society here. Just because your mother hasn’t shaved her pits since the Reagan Administration doesn’t mean you need to be a classic bitch and make them take it off the shelves. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Maybe there’s some broad out there who needs to teach their cat how to sit before it eats their face off and you’re not even giving them the chance to survive.

On second thought, this girl’s version doesn’t help man at all. “How to Turn a No into a Yes” is cunty girlfriend 101. May need to have a book burning not seen since 1933 Germany before this reaches the masses.